I urge you to stop trial and error wiring. You're inviting all kinds of trouble.
Thanks for the fuzzy pictures of the bottom of the relay and the connector.
The relay looks like a Volvo pinout.
How about paying attention to the sides of the relay with a magnifying glass?
see if there's a schematic identifying the pins.
Volvo/Hella relays have info on the sides. Look carefully and report.
I found that that the Volvo/Hella relays have a diode accross the coil which means
that you can hook it up backwards.
Where is the info supplied with the Hella kit? What happened to that?
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